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It's been a loong time

Salut tout le monde!

I know it's been a long long time, dass ich euch nicht mehr geschrieben habe. Gruende: Gute Frage, Stress, hoch und tiefs und generell viel zu wenig zeit . Und ganz nebenbei hab ich den Computer natuerlich auch nicht nur fuer mich selber.

So, nur damit keine Klagen kommen, ich kann euch jetzt schon sagen, dass in diesem Text wohl saemtliche Saetze in englisch oder sogar franzeosisch vorkommen, ganz einfach, weil ich so daran gewoehnt bin hier alles zu mixen und es ganz ehrlich super hart mittlerweile ist, deutsch zu denken und zu sprechen, so komisch das vielleicht auch klingt. Ich hab hier vor ein paar Wochen die eltern von dem husband (mann)der cousine meiner gastmutter (carmen) auf einer familien party getroffen und die sind deutsche. Actually, sie kamen aus der Naehe von Cloppenburg und mit ihnen hab ich dann mehr oder weniger detusch geredet. Das ging dann aber eher so, dass sie aud detusch geredet haben und ich automatisch auf english geantwortet habe. Soo weird. Naja, ich hab dann doch 1-2 detusche Saetze rausgekriegt, aber komisch wars trotzdem. Ich denk auf englisch und zwischendurch auch mal auf franzoesisch und ich frag mich bestimmt schon seit 2 wochen was drunk auf deutsch ist, mir ist das word einfach nicht eingefallen. Gut gerade hab ich im Woerterbuch nachgeguckt: Kofferraum. Omg, das Wort hab ich soo lange gesucht. Schon komisch. Ich werd mir irgendwie im Deutschunterricht in der 12 verloren vorkommen...und letztens hab nen Satz von ner Freundin gelesen: Ish libe dien Deuschland. Ok, ich wusste das der Satz komplett falsch war, aber ich hab mich einen Moment ganz ehrlich gefragt, was bei Deuschland fehlt, bis ich dann drauf gekommen bin: Ach, das T fehlt. Jaja, so schlimm ist das mittlerweile bei mir..

Aber anderes Thema, in weniger als 7 wochen geht es fuer mich schon wieder zurueck nach Deutschland (nach Hause). Einerseits, klar freu ich mich euch alle bald wiederzusehen, auf der anderen Seite kommen mir jedes Mal die Traenen, wenn ich daran denke, dass ich schon bald wieder fliege. Montreal ist mein zweites Zuhause geworden, einen Ort, den ich zu lieben und zu schaetzen gelernt habe. Ich kann mir einfach nicht vorstellen, mein Leben, was ich mir hier aufgebaut habe, meine Freunde und alle Leute, die mir hier so wichtig geworden sind, einfach hinter mir zu lassen. Ohne zu Wissen, wann ich wiederkomme. Ich war diese Woche mit meiner ganzen Stufe in einem camp fuer 2 tage und das waren vielleicht DIE emotionalsten 2 tage, die ich hier bisher hatte. Mit 100 girls, 5 teachern und 3 animateuren zusammen ueber Freundschaft, die past, die zukunft und uebers Leben zu reden, eine erfahrung, die wohl fuer ziemlich lange in meinem gedaechnis bleiben will. Ich kann euch sagen, alle haben mindestens an einem punkt geweint (even die lehrer). Wir konnten an meinem Punkt nachrichten an unsere freunde schreiben und specially (besonders) das ging allen ziemlich nahe. Ich konnte an diesem punkt nicht weinen, aber das war wohl auch besser so, dafuer ging mir eine andere activite (aktivitaet) ziemlich nahe, wo wir uns unsere zukunft in 5 jahren vorstellen sollten und ich 2 dinge "gesehen' habe, die mich ziemlich mitgenommen habe. eine war eigentlich ziemlich positiv, trotzdem ziemlich ueberraschend zu "sehen" und die anderen, jap die war leider echt traurig...

Aber um einfach mal ein paar Nachrichten von meinen Freunden zu zitieren: "remember our door will always be wide open for u to come back...anytime" (sab, eine echt gute freundin). "j'aime beaucoup Eva et tu vas me manquer lorsque tu vas retourner en Allemagne" (Jade, nich mich immer "haaaewa" nennt. tu es unique!), und noch einige andere, die alle super lieb waren. Uebersetzung folgt...ich muss nur schon wieder los, aber fortsetzung folgt bald, versprochen

alle liebe. bis denne! eva  

20.5.08 03:30


trying to find my way... I found it :)

Salut!

Ok, I'll write in english that is first of all easier and i want that my friends here understand it too...i know you guys in germany will not understand everything, then just ask and I'll translate it later. I'm just too tired to think in german now...

So it's been a normal weekend. Well, actually is was amazing . The week passed by so fast, 2 weeks of school left, then final exams, prom, 2 weeks and I'm leaving . Ok, but don't let me start with that...about the weekend. Yes, i stayed at home friday night, relaxing...I'm soo tired in the last time...i slept when we came home from school for like 1,5h...and i spent the evening in front of the computer. i was watching german tv, soo funny. I tried to translate everything in english in my head, but they spoke too fast. Anyways, that is not really what i wanna talk about.

Next day: SATURDAY, started early with cleaning our room. i went to Patro (the place where i play volleyball), to say bye to everyone and to get the CD with all the photos. I didn't get them at the end, but amélie will send me them by msn ...well and then, yeah, i left the house around 6.15pm to get to Laval. Going out with Sab, cat and camille to rockaberries :D. I took like 1h to get there and you could call it: eva lost in Laval vol.1. i went twice in the wrong direction to get from the metro station to rockaberries and I even asked somebody in a restaurant for the right street. Sure, i was late but at least i wasn't the latest...but to find rockaberries that was actually fun, i didn't walk a long time, just like 10 minutes and i looked around be (i haven't been to laval that often) and i really liked it. i don't know. I love montréal, but in Laval I felt home directly . Anyways, sab and cat were already there and we got a table outside. Camille arrived finally too. It got cold outside, so we moved inside and we offert: nachos and some with poulet so share with everybody (it was goood) and we talked about different thing and you won't believe it: in french. Ok, i was like more passive in the whole conservation, but i spoke french (even if i had to repeat every sentence several times xD. seriously, my french isn't that bad...). time passed my, we ordered dessert. Omg, the cakes are soo good....

In planning what we're doing next, we ended up in cat's car on the way to jade. We met her in the parc next to her house, but nobody else was there, no boogie (translation: party). no nothing...so we ended up in cat's car again on the way to sab's house. There, we went different ways, i went with sab, cuz i sleep over in her house and cat and camille left. Later, sab tried to call them, cuz it was only ten and we could watch a move or they would just come over for a while, but it was already too late and the were too far away...ok next time, we organise better the whole thing, cuz we planned on going to the movies, but it was too late for that...anyways, so i just watched with sab a bit of a walk to rembember (a saad film) and one episode of laguna beach and then we talked, a lot...

we've talked like for 2hrs about all kind of stuff . Well I mostly talked and it was good to talk about some stuff i've never really talked about here, about hostfamily, friends and yeah school. I remember a longer convo we've had about one friend of us who is trying to find her way. I'm sure she will sooner or later, one day we'll all find our way. I was that girl one year ago. In that year (here) I've learned a lot and I found my way ...

Sab said something too and I think I'll remember this sentence like forever...we were talking about something that I wrote in my book in the text for my hostfamily, because even if I was a part of the family, they made it clear quelquefois that I'm not. That's sad, but I still had a wonderful time with my hostfamily...and she said: "but you're part of my family"...thank you!! I'm soo happy that I met her, all my friends who became really close and who became my family. They are the principal reason why I'm part of the family marie-clarac and they changed a lot, they made this year the time of my life...

well, that's all about this weekend. see you

26.5.08 04:31


The meaning of 'Life sucks' and the question of groups in school or not

Ok and another entry in english. Sorry guys, if you want a translation. just ask... 

Well, I know I didn’t even finish my last entry, and I already start another one...just I wanna write some stuff down which I had in my mind today. First of all, it’s Monday. The weekend is over and the day started early: 6.30 it was already late and I couldn’t even eat breakfast at home. I was lost again and took instead of the 69, the 32...yes; sometimes I’m a lost child. I recognized that when the 32 didn’t turn at the corner (as the 69)...so I had to wait for the next 69. It came finally and I went to Tim Hortens to get my breakfast: Vanille francaise and a bagel avec fromage à la crème...omg I’m soo gonna miss that. Well, then school started with bio, then art. Lauzon’s baby got birth today so he left (Yes, finally)...I went with Ivett and Ste in some classes to find host families for the 3 exchange students next year (2 de l’Allemagne et  une de la Columbie)...third period: Othello exam in English, it was actually ok, we were allowed to use the book ( I didn’t have it, so I had to go to 503 to borrow one. I got it from Pepe. Thank you!). Lunch was pretty interesting today. I ate with Laurie who just came back from the cruise with the orchestra and she talk us a bit about it (she’s playing saxophone and she even won a prix for her solo). We also talked about the groups in our school. That’s a complicated thing and I’m wondering: She was saying: Je suis avec tout le monde. I heard the same sentence 2 days ago from Sab. The thing is, when you’re not in a group and u’re trying to be friends with everybody and get accepted from everybody. That’s not working, because ppl put you automatically in groups. Maybe not everybody, but la majorité and that’s why groups exist. When you’re a part of a group, you feel better, stronger, at the same time you’re pissed sometimes of your group and you want to get away from them. In my opinion, it’s a kreislauf where you can’t get out. Both ways have positive and negative points, but both don’t make you satisfaisant. Last period was French with an examen de lecture and I didn’t go that well. I was missing like 2 questions, cuz I didn’t have enough time and I didn’t understand them, but j’men fou. It’s just one exam and I got another exam back about alice court avec réne: 92%, really goodJ.

Anyways, after school I got my billet for gala méritas. I’m gonna be sitting next to Caro and Cat J...I went home, didn’t really do anything for school, I read cut one of the book Mr Guarino gave us, not bad, short and not hard to read. Inspired me actually to a story, but I won’t have time to write it down...too many things to do first.

Anyway, the second thing I thought about today was the theory of ‘life sucks’. I had a long convo with judy-anne and she wrote it in her line at msn. ‘Life sucks really’. I remember when I wrote it back in march/avril in my msn at the same time than Sab. I remember her saying; ‘Life sucks but I fight ‘til the end’. It was a tough time back then, but in my opinion it’s the way you think about it. I gave her advice to thing positive and that she shouldn’t waste her last month in being frustrated because some things are not working out...Life is not easy, that is true and it’s actually pretty hard sometimes. But I realised, no matter how hard it is: There is always somebody to talk about it. And even it not all of your friends are there, at least one is there, all the time...

I mentioned it in my last entry: Another thing that belongs toasturday: Sab and I talked a long time about a friend in common who is trying to find her way. I’m sure she will sooner or later. I was that girl one year ago who was trying to find her way. In that year, I learnt a lot, some things in the hard way, but I found my way. I don’t know exactly what I wanna do later, but I have something in my mind. I want to have a voice; I want to be able to write about my thoughts and to discuss my opinion with different ppl...Some things I learnt, a lot of people didn’t learn yet.  I learnt them, but that doesn’t make me special. I still just a girl on the way to become an adult. We all are and that’s why nobody of us is different in that way. Some of us already found their way, some of us don’t, but we are all going the same way; together; the way to become an adult.

Another thing, a yes, marie-clarac. The truth is, at the beginning I couldn’t imagine to go to this school for one year. It was different, it was a family and I wasn’t part of it. But with the time, I learnt the value of that school, of the girls and what it means to go there. I’m part of that family now and I would say I’m proud of that. Back in Germany, I could say: I survived one year in a girl’s school, but it became so much more. Marie-clarac is family and when somebody would talk negative about girls schools (my family), I would say you have no idea what it means to go to a girl school. It was one of the greatest and unique experiences I’ve ever had and if you wanna talk bad about girls who are going to a girl’s school or who went to an all-girls school. Well then, you would be fighting with me, because nobody is talking bad MY girls, my family, my sisters :D...                

27.5.08 22:03